Ah, dating. It’s always been a bit of a rollercoaster, hasn’t it? But let me tell you, dating in your 30s? That’s not just a rollercoaster—it’s a whole amusement park of nonsense, complete with long lines, unexpected drops, and questionable safety standards. You’ve lived through enough at this point to know what you want, yet somehow, the dating pool is still full of people who think mixed signals are a valid form of communication.
Recently, I caught up with a friend over brunch (because that’s what we do in our 30s—brunch and conversation, no more tequila shots and shouting over music at 2 a.m.). She was updating me on her latest dating adventures, and I was bracing myself for the usual tales of ghosting, “situationships,” and the infamous he’s just not ready for a relationship right now but still wants to keep seeing you. You know, the classics.
To my surprise, she admitted that one of the guys she’d been seeing had actually been promising at first. She really liked him—he was funny, smart, and a great cook. (That last one is rare.) But lately, she noticed he’d been pulling the busy card. His texts were less frequent, his calls became occasional, and he started saying things like, “I’ve just been swamped with work.”
Now, I don’t want to sound jaded (okay, maybe a little), but I immediately told her: cut him loose. Let that man go.
Listen, if there’s one thing I’ve learned from being on both sides of the dating game, it’s this: people make time for what matters to them. Period. There’s no wiggle room there. Nobody—and I mean nobody—is so busy that they can’t send a text, make a call, or carve out an hour to see you if they really want to. If they’re not making an effort, it’s because they don’t want to. Sorry, but the truth isn’t always wrapped in a bow.
It’s 2025, and we’re too grown to be making excuses for people. Consistency is key. You can’t build anything—friendships, relationships, —without it. So, if someone’s energy is giving you whiplash, take that as the bright, waving red flag it is. We deserve better than people who show up half-heartedly. It’s exhausting trying to decode someone’s “busy” excuses when the reality is, they just aren’t as interested as they say they are. And that’s okay! What’s not okay is wasting your precious time waiting for them to get it together.
Trust me on this one: let’s stop entertaining inconsistency. When someone wants to know you, they’ll make the effort—and it’ll be obvious. If you’re squinting to figure out how they feel, the answer is already clear. Move on, thrive, and save your time for someone who shows up with real intention.
So, to anyone out there navigating the treacherous waters of dating in your 30s, let’s make a pact: no more games, no more excuses, and absolutely no more trying to read someone’s mind. Let’s keep it simple. If they want you in their life, they’ll act like it. And if they don’t? Cut them loose!
Cheers to clarity, consistency, and cutting off the nonsense. 2025 is the year we stop settling for breadcrumbs.
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